20060329

It Is What It Is

Cam'ron & Freeky Zekey: Talkin' About Cam Going to Jail
Cam'ron: Wet Wipes
The Inc Files 7

Been beating this trunk for a while and here's the coming out: Skits are the new songs. Hypothesis reared and ready, New Jersey's erstwhile huckster is the dummy. Scene: Hot 97 interview. Players: Your boy and one of the best hollers in the game, Dipset's own Tony Yay. Motivation: Cam's apparent jailtime and Zeke's been-had-that jailtime.

Like it wasn't already a made-for-TV thriller, "Testify" hisses underneath. Cam practiced his lines in the mirror so, even though this is supposed to be a hard-hitting Larry King style impromptu chat, he soon takes grip. "Pardon me," he says with the politeness of Trump pissing all over the seat, "I'm in interview mode now."

Sometimes this talk-turned-skit turns into a sitcom: "I get shot and go to jail while people who shoot me are still on the streets!" is accompanied by canned booing and "I'm a charity giving citizen-- donated thousands to Katrina" gets some fake applause from the unheard effects genius (Banco?). Zeke turns up out of nowhere getting all wacky neighbor, making sure we still know he's a "Nextel dude, not a pre-paid Cingular dude." So is he chirping from the bing (bing)? Can he shank Travis Barker? Anyway, he's set to drop out of the pen "late '06" (early '08 in Dipland) and his welcome home requests are modest, just "a four-door Maserati with his face in the rims." Done and done.

Oh right, the song. Cam stutters a lot? Kinda funny a little. He references "Duncan Heinz," which Jay did 10 years ago. But it's not a subliminal (I think). That's the thing, not many inside-the-brain crevices here, more like cleaning exteriors. "Go get your wet wipes!" There's a Beautiful Mind oral sex bit but I'm over that. I'm saying, when is Brain Candy going to get its due with the head 'n' helmet massive?

All this and more is why Killa Season the movie will be better than Killa Season the album. Because Cam is bigger than his rhymes. Because he's clowned Bill O'Riley and Tim Westwood. Because, with his vision held back by three and a half minutes, his mind trips over itself trying to fit it all and stumbles. Because if you're the World's Fattest Cat, it's hard to move.